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Once again I made my credit card burn on Amazon for a buy that worthy it, I find. I bought some BCAA pills, not that I’m the bigger gym guy on the planet, but I used it for a particular reason. It helps your body recovering faster after working out

And that’s the selling point, that’s all I care about.

More than appearance, I’m focused on performance.

The BCAA supplement probably acts like a placebo on my brain, but it makes me feels more confident to go all the way because I know that I want be sore, or at least that I will be able to train again the next day.
I don’t do heavy lifting (yet), I’m mostly working on my core, and doing pilates training and a few push-ups along with my dancing.
I find over time that in order to maintain my condition as a dancer I had to concentrate more on my core muscles more than on how my muscles look. In other words

What matter for a dancer is not how you look physically but how you look dancing

And the more I focus on these core muscles, the more they seems to “cement” the integrity of my movements, and the less I actually experience micro injuries.
I think it is crucial. Don’t get me wrong I will eventually be a gym buff (for my not-yet-met female fans) but  I cant go now because I’m not sure if I could be able to afford the increase of food  needed and  the balanced diet required to a proper mass gain. Besides I’m just too poor right now to go to the gym by bus. I can’t go to my local gym people hate me in my neighborhood, I don’t know why. And in the same time you do something different in order to meet different people isn’t it?
So in order to be sure to be in shape to work out everyday and dance I use BCAA pills, I’m really strengthening my core, it doesn’t look impressive but it is actually the very thing that will help me go the distance as a performer.

May it be in my relationship or on stage I always strive for consistency

I might injure myself if I only lift heavy weights, I’d look prettier but would it helps me improve as a performer?
I’ve always been for going to the gym, but for a purpose
The purpose can be anything, from getting more confidence, to health issue, to boosting your physical abilities, but it should never be for your ego

For your confidence, but not for your ego

Again, if you’re asking me whether or not going to the gym will improve my dancing. No doubts. But I have to know how and which muscles to work on as a dancer to not impair my performances.
Buff dancer have become a craze since the 90’s but, the very reason why have always question that is so obvious yet almost mysterious that it might come as a shock. I’ve always been wondering why putting such an emphasize on going to the gym while the greatest dancer of all time, Michael Jackson, never stepped foot in it! He was tall and thin and never had to build up muscles!
The reality is that,

1) Since he’s been performing from his boyhood he didn’t need to build up muscles since these “dancing” muscles had naturally developed with him growing up.
2) I’ve experience myself when I started working out like a madman to fulfil my dream to become a NBA star at 21 (haha that’s a whole other story that I tell you later, but still I’m proud I did this, that was a huge act of faith and it taught me the consistency I’m still applying today) I realized as a was getting weight that I was more explosive, but that I was losing my quickness (and as you know my dancing style is all about quickness) I actually couldn’t dance properly during these time, because I had built other muscles but also because I’ve got to “reset” some part of my body from time to time in order to dance consistently (but again that’s another subject)

But these BCAA pills, how can I say, they help me plunging back in those times when I was alone in the wind, dashing on the gentle slope of motivation to find myself in the deserted basketball court before the sun opened his blazing eyelids.

I can picture perfectly my yellow long-sleeve t-shirt over my turtle neck Under Armor winter “climacool” I think? To keep me warm. I was throwing shots with my frozen hands under the freezing rain, or was it not snowflakes in their childhood?

Or when I was alone in the court with no one to support me and that this place seemed bigger than me, but not big enough to contain my dreams.

It all made me nostalgic, the BCAA and their bland, non-existent taste have become my Proustian memory madeleine.

To sum up

I’ll always take the least impressive path to yield the most impressive results


Some things don’t help you doing something, they help you believing  you can do them

Maybe it was all a dream? But that is the effect the BCAA pills have on me.

Enjoy the grind!
Much Love,


PS: It also contains vitamin B6 that play a role for your nerves.



The day after I criticized my MacBook and its cool,cold body shaped for the future, the nostalgia of our shared past caught up with me.

Organic tea! Ô you organic tea! Why did you have to drown my friend with your flavor of licorice and Ulmus Rubra? Why did you infiltrate the unibody of my companion born from technology.

I indeed didn’t really enjoy, writing a book on a MacBook, I think the experience would have been better on type writer. I still do, and you should do it to. But more than a tool to write, that computer is (was? Oh gosh no…) a part of my life.

All things considered, my secondhand MacBook still named “MacBook d’Adrien” (Adrian’s MacBook) is the only thing I’ve carried throughout my odyssey, and it’s a weird thing to say.

I bought it on a soon-to come spring morning listening to R.E.M – Everybody Hurts why at this moment, I don’t know but this track was amazing. I obtained this MacBook at the the Plan Your Escape Part. III of my life. I had promise my mum that I’d finish school before going to England, but the amount of work needed to get ready for my dream quickly overtook my scholastic pursuit. And to be honest it was flat boring. So just like that, I decided to devote myself to music and that I’d learn all the tips and tricks. Getting a MacBook was a huge step forward for me, for I could record my song, finally. I recorded some cheap demo, singing directly to my computer speakers without micro, phone. That MacBook was (is? Oh my gosh…) my comrade, and was as exited as I was. Together we learned failure, triumph, and glory, hour after after hours we were learning, on the lonely nights on  him I was leaning.

He is the only on I bought to England, the only one bold enough to come in a foreign land.

I often think about Ringo Starr‘s quote when he said that he 

“always felt sad for Elvis because, whenever something good happened in the studio he was the only one there, while the Beatles could share their victories together.”

And I felt the same way, of course I felt the same way. I’ll never forget, the first time I finished a song that (I found) was ready to go on the Internet, I stood up triumphant and I was the only one in the room. I remember that it cooled me off,

The saddest thing is not to lose alone, because you always lose alone, but to win alone.

But wait I wasn’t alone, my friend was there. And he was there when I crossed the sea, when I wrote a book in three day after I quit my job at Chipotle, shivering in this wrinkled house. He was there when they kicked me out with no reason (but manners and in a sensitive way, clowns) and that I found a flat in one day to follow my dreams. He was there when I gathered months after month the equipment to record, mix and produce my first song. He ate with me all the information I bolted down to be ready for the future. He witnessed my improvements, dancing alone in that tiny cube that this well mannered and sensitive well off gentlemen call “a room”. He was there, when I became a man, he was there when I became me, he was there when I transformed, he was there to keep me company.

A few weeks back Agnès discovered that Gaia her cat became blind. He was very sad and wanted to know why for Gaia was an old cat. Gaia accompanied Agnès throughout her trials, ALL THIS TIME. People couldn’t understand how she could be so attached to”a cat”. Me neither I couldn’t totally relate, not because I didn’t empathize but because I made a covenant with myself that commanded me to always keep moving. I was sad for her though. And now, it’s me who feel a bit the same way. Of course I don’t imply that it is the same thing, losing a living creature is way more painful, besides it cannot be replace. Maybe tomorrow I’ll go to the Apple Store and in one week it be fixed, up and running like a MacBook curbs. And What I felt cannot even be considered as painful it’s more about became aware of that I was growing attached to a non human thing how depressing.

Yes it’s all about that, after writing that I look to the my right, invaded percussive sounds and frequencies coming from by the loud speakers of my housemate banging Justin Bieber -Sorry and I thought,

How desperate and lonely should I be to mourn the death of an object.

Ultimately it’s just an object.

My friends brought me some cookies and brownies, although none of them brought some paper and a pen, to express my pain.
Thank you.